Shorter days, busier schedules, and holiday noise can nudge even the best routines off track. In this episode of Parenting Unfiltered, host Sara Kapp talks with Dr. Shauna Eberhardt about practical ways families can balance screens and sleep for kids 0–8, without guilt or power struggles.
The theme running through the conversation is simple: start small and be kind to yourself. As Dr. Eberhardt puts it, “There is no such thing as a perfect parent. Grant yourself grace.”
Focus on Balance
Dr. Eberhardt encourages families to focus less on rigid rules and more on balance that fits real life. Screens are part of school and home now; the goal isn’t zero, it’s being thoughtful about when and how kids use them. That means paying attention to content, co-viewing when possible, and noticing how a child feels after use.
“It’s never about perfection—it’s about balance that works for your family,” she says. If habits have drifted, try negotiated limits (weekday vs. weekend or earlier cutoffs) and swap in small, engaging alternatives—books, games, or a quick walk—so kids have somewhere positive to land.
The Importance of Sleep
Sleep anchors everything. Dr. Eberhardt calls it a basic need alongside food, safety, and love. Tiny, repeatable steps matter most: a consistent order of events, calm cues, and a predictable “wind-down” that tells the brain it’s time to rest. One clever tweak from her home: keep audiobooks but move the phone out of the bedroom—use a Bluetooth speaker on a timer so kids can listen without the late-night scroll temptation. Over time, those small choices add up to smoother evenings and steadier moods.
When you’re changing habits, expect some bumps. Behavior often gets louder before it settles. Dr. Eberhardt recommends introducing changes gradually, think 15–30 minutes earlier bedtime every few nights, and narrating the positives you notice: “You seemed calmer after we read; let’s do that again.” That kind reinforcement helps kids connect routines with how they feel.
Being Present Matters Most
Winter can intensify everything—dark mornings, early sunsets, and big feelings around holidays. Dr. Eberhardt suggests checking in with your own energy as well as your child’s. If grief or stress is present, permission to simplify traditions can be a relief. “Presence is enough,” she says. Some nights, sitting together quietly or watching a favorite movie is exactly the right plan.
Bedtime Swaps That Help
- • Audiobook via Bluetooth speaker; phone stays outside the room (use a sleep timer)
- Offer two choices (e.g., 30 minutes phone or 30 minutes reading) to avoid power struggles
- Keep a simple, repeatable order: brush teeth → pick tomorrow’s outfit → story/poem → lights out
In public pinch points (hello, grocery checkout), it’s common to hand over a device to stop a meltdown. If that’s become the only strategy, try building a small “reset kit” (coloring pad, fidget, snack) and a when-then plan: “When we’re done here, you pick the song for the drive.” First tries may be rocky; deep breaths and consistency help kids learn new patterns.
One-Minute Wind-Down (ages: 3–8)
- Highs & Lows: one good thing and one hard thing from the day
- Three slow belly breaths
- Close with a cue: “Thanks for sharing. Time to rest. We’ll start fresh tomorrow.”
If you feel behind, you’re not alone. Dr. Eberhardt’s closing reminder is the permission many parents need: “It is never too late to make changes, and it’s okay to be where you are.” Start with one small step tonight, model the balance you want to see, and let the routine grow with your family.
Explore more episodes of Parenting Unfiltered for practical, judgment-free tips you can use today. Watch on YouTube or listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and find recaps, handouts, and pocketbooks on the Parents Lead website. New episodes drop throughout the season. Follow and share to support North Dakota families.